Hearty Giggles

What It’s Like To Be Pregnant & Pakistani (It’s CRAZY)


Screen-Shot-2015-11-10-at-3.54.00-PM

Hello folks…

So I have been meaning to do this blog from a very long time but got caught up with other stuff.

Be prepared as I now take you on a journey on what it’s like to be pregnant and Pakistani. Honestly speaking, I think the dilemma lies with all the Asian groups and not just Pakistani….If you can relate to this, we will find out soon 🙂

1. The “Is there a good news” questions.

You get married today, and 5 days later you will start hearing questions from different aunties if there is a good news. Like what the serious ef is that all about?

My first encounter with this situation was just 20 days after marriage, when I went to my neighbor’s house, and her sister in law(who I hardly knew because I had just moved in at my husband’s house) asked me “is there something?” and as naive as I was, I just couldn’t understand what the hell she was asking me. What something is she asking for. I made her repeat 3 times thinking I was missing out any words or something.

After 3 attempts of asking me the same “is there something”, my mother in law replied not yet, everyone will know when there is. Even though I was 2 weeks pregnant by then.

And at that moment, it was a revelation to me. The clouds of singleness had moved away and above me was a sky saying BRACE YOURSELF…PREGNANCY QUESTIONS ARE COMING.

After that incident, these questions kept coming from various aunties wherever I went.

Apparently, Pakistani aunties think you are an ATM machine.

2. Everyone should know…Like literally EVERYONE.

For the first 3 months, the news stays within the 2 families. But the moment those 3 months’ risky time passes away, the news is available for public. Literally public.

First the news goes to close friends and relatives then the friends and relatives will tell their friends and relatives. And the news keeps moving forward. Now this may seem pretty normal because friends and relatives are supposed to know the big news but this doesn’t end with friends and relatives.

You could be walking on a sidewalk with any of your relative and they will tell a stranger to may be walk a little away because this walking lady is now “DELICATE.” This is the term they use. YUPPPPP you heard me right.

You are in a taxi and the driver will be told to drive a little more carefully because Continue reading

Categories: Bits Of My Life, Hearty Giggles | Tags: , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

False Advertising – Do Not Be Fooled


funny-internet-lie

1. Johnson Baby Shampoo – No More Tears

So I was sad a few days back and I was crying a lot. Like tons of tears and that’s when I remembered this very famous brand. And I was like, oh why didn’t I think of that before.

I took one bottle and straight off went to the shower. I was still crying at that time. I took some shampoo and poured it on my head. I massaged the shampoo on my hair and waited 5 minutes for it to start working. But you know what. I was still crying. What the hell did they mean by NO MORE TEARS. Well hello, I am still crying.

I thought, may be my pain is too much so I emptied the entire bottle on my head, I waited 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 15 minutes but my tears didn’t stop.

CLEARLY this is false advertising. Anyway, I did end up with very soft, smooth and beautiful hair afterwards but that’s not the point.

2. AT & T – Reach Out & Touch Someone

I was going to work the other day and I read this slogan on a billboard and I am like, oh that’s a nice slogan and I must do it. I reached out and I touched someone. I got a very harsh stare from that someone.

I thought I must be doing it wrong you know. This time, with more spirit, more optimism and with more love, I reached out and touched someone again.

Well, let me tell you AT & T, I did this a couple of times on my way to work and apparently reaching out and touching someone does not give you good responses. I do not know why you would give us such strange advises. Continue reading

Categories: Hearty Giggles | Tags: , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Sarcastic Quotes & Phrases Coz Sarcasm Rocks :)


I see what you are doing here. You are self praising. That’s okay. I know yourself is the only one who can possibly praise you. Just for your sake, I hope you don’t lie to yourself.

There are 2 facts about you which I should let you know.
1. You are a self praiser.
2. You lie to yourself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? “The chicken saw you coming and said, Oh boy here comes an a**hole life sucking donkey…I better cross the road before he catches me.” I should have crossed the road too.

The ones with pretty face may not have a pretty heart and the ones with pretty heart may not have a pretty face. But there are exceptions. Like you have none and I have both. Continue reading

Categories: Hearty Giggles | Tags: , , , | 2 Comments

My Mom Is…. Well You Probably Should Read This


Funny Mother Meme

My mom is a lecturer.

You would think she is a lecturer in some university holding a professor degree but what’s a professor’s lecture compared to the lectures my mom gives me, almost everyday.

Tell you the truth, at least your professor’s lectures are way better than my mom’s lecture because at least you do have a rough idea what the lecture is about and when it is going to end but my moom’s lecture? Boi oh boi, you never know what the lecture is all about and it is like EVER GOIIIINNNNGGGG…….. Continue reading

Categories: Hearty Giggles | Tags: , , , | 3 Comments

What If Gordon Ramsay Answered Your Google Searches


Hell's GoogleThe other day (well not the other day to be precise but I like the sound of it), my friend and I (yes you would be shocked that I even have a friend) were talking (not arguing coz you would think I am that sort of person who just argues).

Aaaahhhh let me repeat without the brackets before my whole blog gets ruined.

TAKE II

The other day, my friend and I were talking and for some reasons our conversation led up to us discussing how Google would answer questions if it were a human and with all the stupid questions people ask, as a human, Google would get pissed off.

My friend then suggested that I do a blog on it so here I am and this is my blog about how Google actually feels as a human and what better way to describe its feelings than through our very own Gordon Ramsay.

So here is “What if Gordon Ramsay Answered Your google Searches” and you definitely know where this blog is going haha. Continue reading

Categories: Hearty Giggles | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments