In my previous blog “Journey Through A Pakistani Girl’s Wedding – The Rasam“, I took you along with me to a Pakistani girl’s rasam i.e a pre-engagement event. So what next?
Before I tell you what happens next, Let’s introduce the stereotype of Pakistanis being married within the family.
Now you must have been meeting this guy and their family since your childhood as they are your relatives. You must have been practically been raised by his parents and don’t even start me on the fact that as kids, you both played hide and seek and HE ALWAYS PULLED YOUR PONYTAIL FROM BEHIND LIKE IT WAS HIS GODDAMN PURPOSE OF EXISTENCE ON THIS EARTH.
You hated him for doing it.
You both stayed up late nights playing board games while your parents chit chatted in other room, you both had millions of fights and you little miss not-so-innocent always sneaked up for his candy……
You become his fiancée. His parents become your in-laws. And now, everything changes. All the matrixes of your life changes.
Before your engagement, You could open the door when they came unannounced but now you just run into your room like a monster is chasing you because you want to put at least a few coats of makeup on. Because THAT’S HOW YOU REALLY ARE ALWAYS AT HOME….WEARING MAKEUP…. DRESSED AS A BRIDE…
Before your engagement, you could go to their house even when you hadn’t had your daily bath but now you spend an hour in the shower scrubbing your skin as if a new beautiful skin is simply going to come out from beneath.
Before your engagement, you could just cross your legs on the bed and talk to his parents about everything but now your legs aint getting on the bed, they be hanging parallel and you have to think before you speak.
Well, for all that’s changed, one thing that remains absolutely same is HIM ALWAYS PULLING YOUR PONYTAIL FROM BEHIND LIKE IT STILL IS HIS GODDAMN PURPOSE OF EXISTENCE ON THIS EARTH.
But now you sorta like it. Haha
Any public gatherings that you go to, now you are the shining star.
Let me make this easier for you. The time between your engagement and your wedding, you are a star walking on the red carpet. Everyone has eyes upon you. Sometimes you love it, sometimes you loathe it. But you just have to live it.
Having said all that. One good thing that comes out from all this is the love and care you get.
That look of concern from everyone when you so much as even cough on a stubborn rice in throat.
That extra special care you get when you are ill, your mom in law makes food for you and comes to meet you. That warm love when your dad in law kisses your forehead and calls you daughter instead of daughter in law.
That sweet tingling feeling in the stomach when your fiance brings in lots of chocolates for you, hands it in your hand and for a brief fraction of seconds, your hand touches his hand and sparks flare up in your body. That burst of emotions when he whispers ‘I love you” in your ears when no one is watching. That bundle of happiness when he texts you good night and a good morning text is waiting for you in the morning.
And this is not just the end.
That unexplained moment when you are just too scared because you have your phobias, really bad phobias that make you sweat, scared and lose your ability to think, he reads your fears and without a word, holds your hand and holds it tight and that moment you just know that you are safe.
So being engaged has its perks but I am so definitely loving every moment of this time <3.